The 10 Commandments Of The Student Parking Lot

As you’re staring at the red light, the clock screams 7:45 on your dashboard. The sun peeks over your mirror, and the morning has dawned. The light turns, letting you continue your run on MLK Jr. Blvd, towards the south point of campus known as the Student Parking Lot. By this point, the pesky clock says 7:50;  you’re impatient yet too tired to be impatient. After making a slight turn to enter into the lot, you realize that it’s 7:58.

And you’re going to be late. All because of waiting for students being dropped off, students parked over the line, and students texting while walking.

This is one of the many times when you wish there were 10 Commandments for The Student Parking Lot. But fret no longer, Falcon. The time has come.

Behold: The 10 Commandments of The Student Parking Lot.

I. Thou shall not use the student lot as a waiting room.

The lot is always a moving portal, so if you are standing, waiting, or dropping off/picking up behind another car, there’s a good chance you may be in the way.

II. There is a designated drop-off area for students who do not drive, and it is not the Student Parking lot.

The area for drop-off is clearly labeled in the front of CB. But if you so dare to drop-off in the back lot, be certain that there will be student drivers ready to honk their horns.

III. Thou shall not feel “cool” if you are dropped off in the Student Parking lot.

The truth is, you and your parent are only holding up traffic. Be proactive by taking advantage of the “drop off/ pick-up area” located in the front of school.

IV. Thou shall let a Brother back out.

When school’s over, everyone wants to leave. Wait patiently for your fellow Falcon to back out so that they can get home in a timely matter too.

V. Thou shall not flaunt the ability to drive.

No one really cares about your university lanyard or that you drove to school today. Refrain from wearing your keys around your neck or twirling them in the hallway.

VI. Thou shall have no sub-ego.

When it’s 7:30 a.m., no one wants to hear you rockin’ out to Justin Bieber.

VII. Honor your line…by staying in it!

Cars are made to park, not hug. So, do not be afraid to re-park. Even if it takes 4+ times.

VIII. Thou shall not expect to have the same parking spot every single day.

If you want the same spot every day, come at the same time every day.

IX. Thou shall not walk and text.

Pedestrians, this one’s for you. Especially if drivers are running late.

X. Thou shall have the “wave” mastered.

When it’s 7:58 or 3:05 and a driver does not know if they can go, kindly wave to let a Brother in.

The bell rings. It’s 2:50. As you’re slamming your locker shut, your mind wants to be home. Walking out with your keys in hand, all you see is piled up traffic. Your phone reads “3:02,” and your heart sinks. You walk to your car, barely back out, and then you’re at a dead stop like every other Brother. It’s 3:15, and you’re in the same place you were five minutes ago. You have homework, practice, and people to see, not to mention a project due tomorrow. You do not have time to waste in Student Parking lot traffic.

This is your moment of epiphany when you realize you should share the 10 Commandments of The Student Parking Lot to eliminate the waiting time and pile-ups. We’re all in this lot together, Falcons. Help a Brother out.